Book Review: Let's Talk About Pagan Elements and the Wheel of the Year

Yet another Pagan children's book with awkward prose and didactic tone

I was curious about Let's Talk About Pagan Elements and the Wheel of the Year by Siusaidh Ceanadach since I first heard about it a year ago, but I'm disappointed yet again.

I have a library of hundreds of children's books, including classics and a great many obscure treasures that teach children about far-flung cultures, social troubles and emotional issues. I can easily tell the difference between the stories that hold the interest of my children and the children who I teach and those that don't. More importantly, it doesn't seem that long ago since I was a kid myself and I read stories hungrily, spitting out the ones that tasted of dry sawdust or cliched cough syrup and devouring those that had the ring of truth and mutual recognition. 

My collection contains some of most well-known Pagan books for children and yet there are regrettably few modern Pagan books that my children want to sit through, let alone ask for. The stories of Pooka the cat and those in Circle Round are the most notable exceptions. That was why I was so excited about Let's Talk About Pagan Elements and the Wheel of the Year.  It isn't supposed to be just a teaching book. It contains stories about children who modern kids can relate to, or so I was told. 

The book's structure is straightforward, a very brief introduction to elements which reads like a short version of a particularly uninspired adult text. Then there is a short, Wiccan-leaning abstract of each of the eight Pagan holidays that make up the Wheel of the Year in many traditions. After each abstract there is a "story," which is in fact more like a character sketch of a modern child having something to do with the holiday. Each section ends with a list of research questions, asking kids to find details about the given holiday with an emphasis on agriculture.

The prose is the primary problem with this book. It is formal, awkward and pedantic. The tone is that of an adult speaking to a child of about the age of six or seven, while the vocabulary and content is suitable for a trivia-oriented twelve or thirteen year old. The book fails every age level. Younger children will find the content and vocabulary inaccessible, dull and out of touch with their experience. Older children will be likely to reject the book due to the combination of the abstract overviews and the condescending tone.

The "stories" which were originally the most attractive part of the book to me are not really stories at all. There is no tension, no problem to be solved, no question to be answered. Each is essentially a moralizing character sketch that Pagan parents who grew up with Christian Sunday school will recognize in tone and style.  The child in each story has no dilemma but randomly comes across some information or inspiration for the holiday. That's it. The prose is again condescending and uninteresting, although somewhat smoother than the writing in the abstracts.

The last part of each section--the suggested research questions--is arguably the best part of the book. If a parent was teaching children between the ages of eight and twelve about Pagan holidays, one could take these questions and adapt them for use as a kind of scavenger hunt. They won't satisfy the interests of teenagers well but middle grade kids, especially those with some experience with farming, may find them mildly interesting. Still there are better resources available both in books and free on-line. 

All in all, I am still hoping for better Pagan children's books. This one is disappointing with no good excuse. I have no specific quibble with the content. It isn't incorrect or offensive in any significant  way. It leans toward Wiccan paths and has a relatively heavy focus on agriculture, making it difficult for many modern kids to relate to. The Wheel of the Year is tied closely to agriculture after all, but there are better ways of making that connection relevant to children living in cities and growing a pot of basil on their window sill. 

Book Review: Way of the Druid provides a readable, balanced and fascinating overview of both ancient and modern traditions

I grew up with spiritual beliefs adopted from earth-based traditions that floated around the air in my parents' generation. We never had a name for what we believed and were always taught to think that the spirituality of indigenous peoples is to be coveted among those with an earth-based or Pagan bent. Recently I have become interested in more seriously studying the beliefs of various cultures, to understand where our beliefs come from and find appropriate words to describe my own beliefs. 

I jumped at the opportunity to review Way of the Druid by Graeme K. Talboys because I live in an area of Central Europe that was once heavily Celtic. The shadows and echos of ancient Celtic beliefs still crop up in folk traditions from time to time. My own background is mixed enough to contain a little Celt here and there as well. So, I came to the book with interest but a little trepidation. It looked like an academic tome and I wasn't sure I had the attention span at the moment, while dealing with toddlers. 

It is hard to find time to read these days and it takes a lot to hold my attention. It felt a bit difficult to get through the compact section on history at the beginning of Way of the Druid, but when it was over I realized that it was actually fairly painless as histories go. It managed to summarize the history while shedding light on the academic controversies and problems with evidence when detailing the lives of Druids who specifically didn't write down their beliefs. 

After that the book picked up the pace of interest with sections on the Celtic metaphysic, the nature of religion, the history of Druid revivalism and overviews of modern Druid practices, beliefs and traditions. As some other reviewers have mentioned, the book doesn't go into great detail about modern Druid orders or organizations. It isn't dated by a focus on certain groups or events and it is not promoting any particular Druid group or interpretation, which was a great relief to me.

There are controversial matters of academic debate in the book and without going to all the source material, I can't say that the author is correct in all conclusions. However, the work makes a serious attempt at both historical documentation and a solid portrayal of modern Druid traditions, walking a difficult path between being broad enough not to exclude or offend various groups and yet specific enough to make sense.  

I found the prose to be concise and readable. There are dry sections. There is no attempt to make history or the discussion of religion theory into somethihng funny or entertaining. The reader is either interested in these topics or the reader isn't. I am interested and I found the theoretical sections as fascinating as the practical parts. The structure was clear and without meandering. I can easily see where I could come back to the book in the future to find specific information through the table of contents and turn to the right section without trouble, even in the parts that describe seemingly amorphous metaphysical concepts. 

This book would be useful for those interested in comparative theology, religion, European history and anthropology. It is specifically helpful to anyone who wants to understand modern Druids and may be very helpful to those exploring earth-based spirituality. One thing you will find here that I have found lacking in so many other places is a very clear description of the worldview of Celtic peoples and an understanding of how different these views are from Anglo-Saxon, Classical and Abrahamic concepts. It is also very different from the beliefs of indigenous peoples on other continents. It answered a lot of subtle questions I didn't even know how to ask and helped to patch some holes in my web of understanding, linking the diverse cultures that make up our family and social background.  

The balancing act of celebrating Ostara in a Christian-majority culture

Ostara is one of my children’s favorite holidays. Even as toddlers they remembered the experience of hunting for eggs from one year to the next. One of our other family traditions is decorating a plum tree in the front yard with blown eggs, something that a few people in Bohemia still do as part of their Easter traditions.

Our plum tree the year it snowed on Ostara

While I do love Ostara, it is the time of year when the issue of being Pagan in a Christian-majority society comes to the fore.  I would say that it's a greater issue for me at this time of year than it is at Yule. At Yule the Christmas holiday comes so quickly that it is easy for children to understand the connection and not get confused. They easily realize that some people say Yule or Solstice and some people say Christmas or Hanukkah and these are essentially similar holidays with different names and somewhat different traditions. We usually have our main Yule celebrations around the Solstice and then go to the Czech grandparents' place for a secular Christmas celebration that ties in nicely to a "twelve days of Yule" approach.

But with Ostara things get a bit more complicated. Whether we're in Oregon or the Czech Republic it's rare that Easter falls anywhere near Ostara. If my kids talk about hunting for eggs outside of the family, they are often told that they are doing it at the "wrong" time or that they are "mixed up." We have our celebration anyway and even try to invite neighborhood children for an egg hunt if we're in the Czech Republic, where people don't normally do egg hunts. 

Then when Easter comes my kids want to repeat the process because they hear that other kids are painting eggs again, by which time I am usually sick of egg painting and hiding. The neighborhood parents usually come around asking if we can show their kids "that American Easter tradition with the egg hunt" even if we already did one at Ostara time.  

I have yet to come up with a satisfactory solution to this dilemma. On the one hand, I'm adverse to doing things "just because" that's the way society does it. On the other hand, I could just stop struggling and have the egg hunt on Easter or I could do two. It won't kill me. Some years I have done our private egg hunt and tree decorating on Ostara and then a neighborhood event on Easter, while mumbling something to my kids about how Christians celebrate Easter later in connection with the cycle of the moon as well as the sun, which is in fact true. But one year this came right before Beltane and it really was a bit confusing to the kids. 

Besides that, I simply feel that it weakens our family traditions to have outsiders question what I do and tell my kids that it is "wrong" or "mixed up." 

The fact is that our Pagan tradition has a very simple, reasonable explanation. It's tied to the clearly observable seasons of the year. It can be celebrated merrily by my atheist husband because you don't have to believe in a deity in order to honor nature and be glad that its spring. The most essential thing to me is that I want my children to have a tradition beyond the electronic, commercialized modern world... any tradition really. 

I grew up in an age when it was assumed that there were "ethnic groups" who had traditions. And then there was everyone else (i.e. white people) who are boring and soulless and have no real traditions, except church which only sort of counts even if you're Christian. And we weren't even that. Some young people struggle more than others with the issue of "identity" and I struggled quite a bit. I was raised with earth-based spiritual beliefs, but my parents never used and still don't use the word "Pagan." Our beliefs were unnamed and usually swept to the side whenever a stronger societal, secular tradition like Easter or Christmas intruded. 

I ended up feeling like what we believed was somehow "fake" or "made up." In fact, when I tried to explain my beliefs to friends in my late teens, those are the words they used. The first time I heard about Neoaganism was from Wiccans at collage and I didn't immediately understand that they were fairly close to what we were. They had a name and a clear tradition and the strength of numbers. I wanted to be part of it but I didn't want to "give up" what my family believed and it took ten more years before I realized that we weren't nearly so alone as I'd thought. 

Then when my first child was a baby I read a book called The Heart of a Family, which I highly recommend to anyone who wants to raise resilient children in the modern world, whether you follow Pagan, Christian or any other spirituality or philosophy.  The book contains a wealth of practical ideas, including one I'll describe in detail when Lughnasadh comes around. But more than the specific ideas for building family traditions in whatever culture or religion you happen to be in, it gave compelling and research-based reasons for what I had always intuitively known - that family traditions and identity are very important to kids, even crucial to a grounded and resilient self in young adulthood.

One of the most powerful passages in the book sites studies and empirical evidence that shows that the practice of strong family rituals (i.e. traditions that are repeated consciously, not necessarily spiritual or magical rituals) is the most important factor in determining which young people can navigate the self-destructive perils of modern society safely. The studies found that the consistent use of family traditions and rituals was more strongly correlated to good outcomes for young adults when it comes to avoiding problems like substance abuse than economic or social class, single or two parent household status or any of the other factors we tend to think of as so important to raising kids. In short, the conscious practice of family traditions is like a protective shield that you can give your children. It gives them a place to start and the language to express themselves. They may choose to forge new traditions or to carry on your traditions, but whichever they choose it will come from a place of strength.

So, this is why I insist on Ostara traditions, even though society makes it awkward. I can't fully celebrate Easter with a clean conscience. I"m not Christian and simply commercializing it into a secular holiday does no one any good. Ostara truly does mark the beginning of spring in our climate. There is reason to celebrate and the themes of fertility and new life serve to connect us to the natural world. That is essentially one of the reasons I think neo-Pagan traditions are so strong, because without conscious effort it is so easy to live in artificially heated buildings in this age and barely notice the changing of the seasons, let alone the phases of the moon. So, for us to celebrate Ostara is  a truly necessary and practical part of connecting with the earth and raising children who have a deep intuitive sense of that connection rather than a merely intellectual understanding of the seasons.

Crafts

Ostara crafts usually center around eggs, rabbits, rainbows, plants and babies, whether animal or human. Eggs are the obvious and ancient symbol of fertility in too many cultures to name. The rabbit appears to come from the Germanic tradition of the goddess Ostre, who's sacred animal is the hare. The hare is also closely connected with the moon in many cultures.

Ukrainian eggs that I love but can't actually make. Image provided by Carl Fleischhauer, Library of Congress

There is a lot more you can do with eggs than you might think. Beyond dying boiled eggs with natural food colorings (tumeric = yellow, beets or red onion peels = red, purple cabbage = a clear beautiful blue), we also paint blown eggs with acrylic paint so that we can hang them on our plum tree outdoors and not have them washed off by the rain. In Central and Eastern Europe there are extensive traditions involving coloring eggs in fantastic patterns. Many of these techniques involved dying the eggs in layers while keeping bits of the previous layers from the new dye with wax. I am not a skilled enough artist to do these with any great skill but they are fun for experiments.

Two other simple crafts involve the failed attempts to blow eggs. If you do blown eggs and you accidentally break a few, don't worry and don't throw the shells away. All you need is half or three quarters of a shell. Make a ring out of paper as a stand. Then place a bit of candle wick in the bottom of your egg and pour heated wax or even melted crayons on it and you have a beautiful Ostara candle. Or if you would rather, fill the egg shell with a little potting soil and grow lettuce or herb starts in them. What could be a better symbol of new life than tiny plants growing out of an egg shell? If you crack the shell afterward you can plant it directly in the garden that way. All of this egg decore is good for alters and tables.

Another fun Ostara craft involves using the egg shape of a balloon.  If possible put a piece of chocolate or something pretty inside the balloon. Then blow it up. Then dip pieces of yarn in a mixture that is half water and half glue with some flour added and drape these around the balloon until it is completely covered with intricate webs of gooey yarn. Leave this to dry. Pop the balloon and you should have a beautiful egg shape with a surprise inside. 

We usually also make rainbow wands by simply attaching pieces of rainbow-colored tissue paper to the ends of sticks and letting the kids wave them around wildly. We often make some sort of paper hare and various other baby animals, sometimes as window art to put up to brighten the still muddy view outdoors. 

Cooking

It’s still all about eggs. Well, given that a lot of eggs get used in the crafts, it only seems reasonable that one should eat them. We’ll make quiche and pudding at the very least. I usually also manage to make a risoto that is packed with the earliest nettles.  

If I am feeling particularly enthusiastic, I get out the one hare-shaped cookie cutter and make simple lemon-zest Ostara cookies. However, the kids mainly associate Ostara with the chocolate found during their egg hunt, so I am unlikely to be able to create any lasting impression with my seasonal cooking.

Ritual and fun

Ostara isn't a big time for rituals in our family. Between celebrating in a kid-friendly way and all the activities of early gardening we are already steeped in the season and the energy of new life. This is one of those times when our spirituality is simply so intertwined with the practical necessities of life that it is inseparable. I do small blessing and fertility rituals to get our garden beds off to a good start but these are rarely done specifically on Ostara. Instead they are part of the season and are done whenever I happen to be able to dig into the dirt after the ground thaws. This year that has already happened but some years it doesn't happen until after Ostara.

The main attraction of the holiday is a decorating the outdoor plum tree and the egg hunt for the children.

My kids love to dye eggs but they also love to find chocolate eggs. I do not love to have them eat the horrible, fake chocolate tainted with metal that comes in the tinfoil wrapped chocolate eggs from the store. So, instead I have acquired a stash of plastic eggs that I keep hidden in a deep dark drawer. I pull these out on the night before Ostara and put good quality chocolate candies in them. Then I have the magic moment of getting up early on Ostara morning to hide the boiled eggs and the chocolate-surprise in the first morning dew, while communing with the first fairies, sprites and nature spirits of the springtime. When the kids get up they can then run outside and gather them up int heir baskets. 

We decorate the plum tree later on by hanging blown eggs by yarn or ribbon from the branches. Each year some of the eggs get knocked down or broken so this is not a place I put any particularly precious painted eggs. 

Beyond that there is almost always some planting of garden beds and starts at Ostara or during the nearest weekend. The kids will have their own little garden bed that they haphazardly plant, weed and water with variable success. 

Imbolc inspirations for families

Good cheer! Good cheer! Imbolc in near!

Imbolc is one of the least flashy Pagan holidays and it can easily be neglected. It is also probably the least oriented towards children of all the celebrations, but this is unfortunate. Imbolc is one of my favorite celebrations and I have found some very fun and appropriate ways to include my preschool-age children, while reserving time for adult introspection and inspiration. 

For six years, I held a small women’s gathering with a group of old friends as an Imbolc celebration. Until one of the fathers developed leukemia, we managed to get the men to take care of the children, so we could have some much-needed women's time. The past few years have seen many illnesses among the group and some particularly long, gray winters. As a result, we now celebrate Imbolc mainly with our own family. 

Crafts

Every year now, I construct a Brigid’s Cross, either out of plum twigs or out of corn stocks that I have saved from the previous year's harvest. Named after the Irish goddess of fire and healing, Brigid, the cross looks like a runic symbol of a square in which each of the four sides extends on the right-hand side. The basic cross is made by weaving together 12 sticks or stalks of grain. Then it is traditionally hung by the door of a dwelling to protect the home from harm in general and fire in particular. I made two, one to hang on the door like a seasonal wreath and one to hang near the hearth throughout the year.

Here's a link to a how-to showing some alternative methods of making a Brigid's cross.

I also make a Brigid doll out of small tree branches, dried flowers from the herb harvest., scraps of white cloth and red yarn. The basic idea is to take two sticks, cross them and bind them together with yarn. Then, I take a wad of cloth, cover it with more cloth to make a roundish lump and bind that to the top part of the cross to form a head. Then I lay a bouquet of dried flowers down along the bottom of the center stick like a dress and cover it with more cloth. I add decorations that look like a shawl and a yarn belt and paint on a face. The doll is an integral part of our child-friendly Imbolc ritual.

With a holiday so dependent on candles caution bears repeating. Imbolc is a particularly bad time to let candles burn unprotected. 

We had a close call with fire a few years ago, even though it didn't have to do with lit candles. My niece who was then nineteen visited shortly after the children and I had done our Imbolc ritual, and she made a fire in the wood stove without noticing that the Brigid doll and other items had been placed on top of the cold stove. The doll was badly scorched but nothing else was harmed before the problem was noticed. My niece felt terrible about ruining the Brigid doll and the kids were sad but after I thought it over, I realized the synchronicity of the moment. Brigid is the goddess who protects households against fire and in this case the Brigid doll had taken the brunt of the danger of fire, been scorched and had not burst into flame despite being made out of dry twigs and dried flowers, thus truly protecting us from fire. Make of it what you will but be sure to discuss fire safety with young children, if you introduce them to candles as a part of ritual.

A key symbol of Imbolc for my kids is an Imbolc crown. I use white paper and cut a strip to go around their heads. Then we attach four shorter white strips sticking up and flame-shaped bits of red paper to the tops of these. The effect looks like a crown made of four candles. I use four for the four elements, but seven is another number that is traditional for Imbolc, if you are feeling ambitious or have older children. The children color their crowns and I help by adding appropriate symbols and runes. My kids enjoy wearing these crowns for our Imbolc ritual.

Kids with Imbolc crowns demonstrating fire protection knowledge

The children and I also make three snake-shaped candle holders out of salt dough and paint them white, red and black to symbolize the triple goddess. The snake candle holders are easy to do. Make two long snakes out of dough. Coil one of them into a spiral to form the base of the candle holder. Using a tea candle as a mold, coil the other one around the edge of the base and build it up two or three layers. Form the end of the second snake into a triangular head and add dots for eyes. Brigid's animal symbol is the snake.

One year we decorated a special wish jar with tissue paper and sparkles. Imbolc is a time of making wishes for the year ahead and hoping for prophesy. Now we use this jar each year to store our wishes for the coming seasons.

Cooking

I make a traditional red-colored Imbolc soup that includes red lentils, lots of red peppers, pumpkin, carrots and red onions. I also make garlic rolls with seeds in them. Given that Imbolc is associated with the very beginnings of life and spring, it is always fitting to cook something with seeds at this time of year.

Both my husband's and my niece's birthdays come right around Imbolc, so their birthday wishes often take over the cooking regime. For several years now, their desire has been cinnamon rolls and this is quickly becoming an Imbolc tradition.

During the Imbolc season I decorate the table with lots of candles and a ceramic plate covered with salt, clear and amethyst quartz crystals and seven tea candles. This makes a beautiful and thematic center piece. 

Ritual and fun

With kids, I consider Imbolc to be the ideal time to start a cycle of education about gardens and plants. For preschool children it is good to start with a practical demonstration of sprouting seeds. You can use alfalfa sprouts and have the added benefit of getting to eat the results. Or you can try one of the contraptions that allows you to see a sprouting bean seed through a clear container. 

Last year, my kids experimented with planting beans in a box that had one side cut off and covered with plastic wrap. They were supposed to be able to see the seeds sprout and put down roots. The only problem was that the seeds we planted right next to the plastic wrap didn’t sprout well, but other bean seeds in the box sprouted and grew like crazy, all over the window. Still beans are particularly effective in getting the kids thinking about how seeds sprout because they sprout so quickly. Obviously this is also the time for planting some of the long-term starts that will be transplanted to the garden in the spring.

Imbolc provides the occasion for the first basic ritual my children have directly participated in. Do to the unique ritual crafts of Imbolc, it actually provides a nice opportunity for including children in ritual. We light candles in our snake candle holders and the kids wear their Imbolc crowns. We let the kids cast a circle by grasping hands in a circle and turning clockwise while saying, "North, south, east west. May our circle now be blessed." The circle is cast right in front of our hearth and the Brigid doll is sleeping on the hearth in a basket. The highlight of the ritual is when the children "wake up Brigid" by gently setting the doll upright and showing it the candles and other offerings. We sing appropriate songs such as “Rise up, oh flame” and “The earth, the air, the fire, the water returns”.Next, the children write or dictate their wishes for the next year. Slips of paper with these wishes are rolled up and put through a slit in the lid of the wish jar. We also make an offering to the spirits of our hearth and ask for protection. Finally, we use sage smoke to purify our new Brigid’s Cross, which we hang above the hearth for year-round protection from fire. Then the children open the circle by joining hands and going counterclockwise while saying, "East, west, south north. From our circle we go forth." This is all simple and active enough for very young children. 

I always make time for adult rituals and reflection after the children are in bed as well. Imbolc is truly a time when the need for introspection and quiet can become urgent. I would love to hear about your Imbolc traditions for adults or children. Please feel free to share in the comments box below. 

Twelve Days of Yule: Crafts, songs and cooking

I am sitting here with a glass of eggnog topped with freshly grated nutmeg. So, you can probably guess that I like this holiday. There are plenty of reasons to like it. First of all, whether we're in Central Europe or in Oregon when the time comes, the people around us are celebrating too. That comes with the handy bonus of some days off work, which are often sorely lacking during other Pagan Sabbats. The days off don’t exactly coincide with the Solstice but they still help out, especially if you celebrate the Twelve Days of Yule in one way or another.

The other reason I like Yule is the feeling of magic and wonder that seems to permeate the natural world during this season. I was always uncomfortable with secular Christmas and the commercialization of the holiday, even as a teenager. But I haven't let that stop me from absorbing the vital energy of the sun's return.

Still, not everyone in our family is quite so enthusiastic. When I told my Czech husband that there are twelve days of Pagan Yule he was aghast, saying he can barely handle one holiday. His mother gets very stressed over Christmas and he still has unresolved anxiety around the holidays. I rushed to reassure him. One thing I like about spreading it out is that there is no one big blow-out celebration and thus no one moment when everything has to be perfect or else it is all ruined. There is something, often a minor thing, special each day and a lot of it is flexible. Also children can get several gifts but only one at a time, which cuts down on the extremes of over-excitement as well as the greedy consumerism. Philosophically, the focus of this Sabbat should be on mystery and magic (spelled any which way), so secrets around gifts are quite called for as are fables about jolly old men arriving in the middle of the night and other things of wonder.

So, here goes.

Crafts and Cooking

Most years, I go out on a crisp, clear day to gather twigs from bare trees to make branch candles. You take a glass or clear jar and hot glue or even just rubber-band a neat row of twigs around the outside of the glass. If you use rubber bands, you might have to cover them with pretty yarn to make it more decorative. Then, you put a candle inside and you have a beautiful candleholder that can be used in the run-up to Yule to symbolize the hidden light of the sun dwelling in the womb of nature.

Next, I fix up my Czech advent wreath turned alter piece for the elements. In the Czech Republic people put a ceramic wreath accented with twigs of evergreen on their table. The wreath has four candle holders on it and four red candles are placed in these. Then, for four weeks before Christmas, they light candles – one on the first Sunday, two on the second and so on. It occurred to me this is a perfect stand for four elements candles. So, I decorate ours in a similar way and light each candle in honor of one of the elements, calling for the aid of elements in bringing the light and warmth of the sun back to us. All this requires for decoration is a few sprigs of fir and juniper from our trees and some dazzling orange suns that I cut out of tangerine peels.

I also make a very simple evergreen wreath for our door and the children make paper snowflakes for the windows. We make ice candles closer to Yule, so that they can be used on Solstice night. You do this by freezing a bowl or plastic container of water in the freezer with a tin can positioned in the middle of it, so that when you take it out and remove the bowl and the can, you have a bowl of ice with a depression in the middle for a candle. Again, this is a symbol of the sun being reborn in cold and ice.

This year we have already made salt dough ornaments and painted them, although this is really the only major craft I have planned with the kids, other than lots of cookies. I will try to make pinwheel cookies. I already have some gingerbread dough in the freezer and I’ll make sugar cookie dough, so we’ll make gingerbread figures and cookies in the shapes of suns, stars and Yule trees. And I will make our annual, much anticipated pan of decadent cinnamon rolls. 

The most important meal of the holiday comes on the eve of the Solstice for us. That is when we traditionally make round dishes. Usually we try to stick to a theme of the sun and the night sky. So, I usually make shepherd's pie with mashed potatoes on top. I liberally mix in tumeric powder with the mashed potatoes, which is tasty, healthy and handy for making the pie look like the sun. I also make blueberry or huckleberry pie for desert and put moon and star cookies on top to make a night sky.  There is always a large round dish of baked pumpkin or winter squash with brown sugar and butter on top. This is simple and uses our most successful home harvest crop.

Songs

Yule is good when it comes to songs but difficult at the same time. One of the hardest things about not really being able to relate to Christmas for me is that for years I have struggled with the fact that I like Christmas carols. I even like some of the overtly religious ones. For one thing, they have wonderful tunes and for another thing, they speak to some primal instinct for celebration in the season. Even the texts of the religious ones evoke the very spirit of wonder and comfort at the magical rebirth of light and hope that is at the heart of Yule. Certainly, some of the tunes of these songs predate Christianity, though we don’t always know for certain which ones.

One that we do know is Pagan for sure is:

Deck the Halls

Deck the halls with bows of holly

Fa la la la la la la la la

‘Tis the season to be jolly

Fa la la la la la la la la

Don ye now your gay apparel

Fa la la la la la la la la

Join the ancient Yuletide carol

Fa la la la la la la la la

See the blazing Yule before us

Fa la la la la la la la la

Strike the harp and join the chorus

Fa la la la la la la la la

Follow me in merry measure

Fa la la la la la la la la

While I tell of Yuletide treasure

Fa la la la la la la la la

Fast away the old year passes

Fa la la la la la la la la

Hail the new, ye lads and lasses

Fa la la la la la la la la

Sing we joyous all together

Fa la la la la la la la la

Heedless of the wind and weather

Fa la la la la la la la la

And here are some others with common tunes intact but with words that have been adapted by modern neo-Pagans. If anyone is upset by Pagans co-opting Christian songs for the holiday, one might point out that the Christians first co-opted the whole holiday from the Pagans of long ago, so it is justice of a sort.

Silent Night

Silent night, solstice night

All is calm, all is bright

Nature slumbers in forest and glen

‘Til in springtime she wakens again

Sleeping spirits grow strong!

Sleeping spirits grow strong!

Silent night, solstice night

Silver moon, shining bright

Snow blankets the sleeping Earth

Yule fires herald the sun’s rebirth

Hark, the light is reborn!

Hark, the light is reborn!

Silent night, solstice night

Quiet rest ‘til the light

Turning ever the rolling wheel

Brings the winter to comfort and heal.

Rest your spirit in peace!

Rest your spirit in peace!

Oh, Come All Ye Kindred

Oh, Come All Ye Kindred

Gather round the Yule Fire

Oh, come ye, oh, come ye,

To call the Sun.

Fires within us

Call the Fire above us.

Oh, come let us rejoice now.

Oh, come let us rejoice now.

Oh, come let us rejoice now

For the reborn Sun.

Yea, Sun, we greet Thee!

Born again at Yuletide!

Oh, Yule fires, Oh, trees bright

Are lighted for Thee!

Come and behold it

Light this day returns to us.

Oh, come let us rekindle.

Oh, come let us rekindle.

Oh, come let us rekindle.

The returning sun.

Finally, here is an original Yule song that came more or less unbidden into my head. The words can be sung to either Good King Wenceslas or Amazing Grace, depending on your mood.

Promised Hope

(To the tune of Good King Wenceslas)

O, promised hope that we hold dear

As days grow dark and cold.

All people wait this time of year

As ancient tales are told.

Father Sun departs the Earth.

The Goddess holds her child.

So, here we gather by the hearth,

While winter storms grow wild.

In darkest night, the world so chill,

We watch twelve days of Yule

To see the sun returning still

To herald the earth’s renewal.

Oh, Solstice Tree

 

Oh, Solstice tree

Oh, Solstice tree

How lovely are your branches.

Ever green through winter days.

Reminding us of old time ways.

Oh, Solstice tree

Oh, Solstice tree

How lovely are your branches.

Now sparkling with dazzling light

You bring us joy and delight.

Any other verses anyone?

The Twelve Days

This year, because we are in Eastern Oregon in the mountains, we will be able to go out and pick a little tree that needs thinning. We'll do that this weekend. We will then be set for the great celebrations to begin. This year I’m going to take a crack at some sort of celebration for each of the twelve days of Yule.

On the first night of Yule – that is for us the evening of the 20th of December – we will have a special dinner to honor both the sun and the “womb of the night” that holds the sun on Solstice night with round dishes, probably a round casserole, as well as baked pumpkin and tangerines for the sun and huckleberry pie with stars cut out of dough on top for goddess of the night. We will light our ice and branch candles and as many others as we want, to keep vigil on the longest night. We won’t leave them lit though, as fire is too much of a hazard here. Instead we will bank the fire to last. We’ll light the first of twelve candles and say something we wish for more of in ourselves during the next year. Each evening we will light one more of the twelve candles and tell the children what they symbolize. With somewhat older children one could say something one appreciates about each daily theme with the lighting of the new candle. Then, we will sing and put the children to bed.

In the morning on the 21st, I will wake up the children before dawn and get us all dressed to go outside. We’ll go out to the boulder where our grandmother's ashes were scattered and drum and sing to welcome the reborn sun. I will have to pay attention to when exactly dawn comes in order to keep the children from standing too long in the cold.

The first day of Yule has an outward focus of the sun and an inward focus on taking care of yourself. I think I may be able to bake my favorite cinnamon rolls on this day. I will also find some quiet time to do an annual Tarot reading that I do on the Winter Solstice. It is made up of a circle of twelve cards, each representing a month of the coming year, and one central card. It is the only truly predictive reading that I use.

The 22nd, the second day of Yule, is dedicated to prosperity and possessions. So, this is a logical time for giving and receiving, which is handy because the first day of Yule is usually hectic enough without adding gifts.  The evening before the children will put cookies by the hearth and say a special sun blessing. They will wake up to a present under the tree from Santa Claus and stockings full of good things. In this sense Santa Claus is the spirit of the old year and the old sun, he is an old man with a long white beard, dressed in the warm red of an old fire. We’ll also have a special family meal and give thanks for all that we had or gained in the old year.

On the 23rd, we will find time to go for a walk and sing carols. The third day of Yule is dedicated to communication and voice, thus singing.

The fourth day is dedicated to the home, so we usually stay home and make a special Czech holiday dinner of carp and potato salad and there will be another gift under the tree in the evening for the children. It is handy that the 24th is a state holiday here. This time the gift is brought by the newborn Baby Sun (a Pagan take on the atheist Czech tradition that has it that a magical spirit called, oddly enough for the Czech anti-thiests, “Little baby Jesus” sneaks into the living room to leave gifts while the family is somewhere else in the house). One of the adults usually distracts the children in another room while the other puts out the gifts, rings a small bell and jumps into the bathroom to pretend that he or she wasn’t actually there when Baby Sun showed up.

On the 25th, we often bake star-shaped gingerbread cookies that are made to stack one on top another to form trees. These we can decorate with white frosting and sparkles like Yule trees. We will make enough to take with us to the cousins the next day. This fifth day of Yule is dedicated to play and creativity.

The sixth day of Yule is dedicated to health. If we were at home in the Czech Republic, we could have a sauna on this day. Instead we'll soak in my mother's hot tub under the pine and apple trees. 

The seventh day is dedicated to love relationships. This is the first time my husband and I have been apart at this time of year in many years. Usually, we are visiting the relatives on Dec. 27th and we seize this rare opportunity to have babysitters and go on a date – the only date we get in a year without kids. It isn't much, just a quiet walk and a little while in a café in the picturesque little town of Trebon, but it is better than nothing.

The eighth day of Yule is dedicated to change and cycles and so it is a particularly good day for a ritual around something that needs change. It is also a time to honor the natural cycles of rebirth in some way. On this day we usually stage a change-of-the-guard pillow fight with the kids. This is where the children, as symbols of the new sun, pummel the parents, symbols of the old sun, with pillows and eventually “win” by exhausting them.

The ninth day of Yule is about learning, so we will surely read some of the Yule stories in the book Circle Round on this day and perhaps have some fun board games as a family. This is also Dec. 29, which is a day on which we honor our children’s birth families, because it is the birthday of one of their birth mothers. We will light a special candle.

The tenth day of Yule is dedicated to career and life path. For older children this would be a good day to play the game of life, dress up as various professions or have a discussion about what they want to do with their life path. We will probably read picture books about different professions and try to act them out. I will also do a ritual for myself around figuring out my own life path.

The eleventh day of Yule is for friendships and community. It is also New Year’s eve, so it is a good time to get together with a circle of friends that is broader than family. It is also a good day to discuss with children and decide something to do to help the community or other people in the world during the coming year, a special kind of New Year’s resolution. We will also visit an elderly neighbor on the day its self.

The final, twelfth day of Yule is dedicated to dreams, the subconscious and mysteries. If one has not overindulged too much on New Year’s night interesting dreams might come. It is a good time for introspective writing. I will try to make a mystery treasure hunt inside the house for the children to find a final treat of the season on New Years day. One Czech tradition we have adopted is that we always eat lentils (a symbol of prosperity) on New Years day (the twelfth day of Yule) in order to ensure abundance in the coming year.

That is the basic idea of our holiday traditions. We get a lot done without making any of it particularly stressful. I hope this year we will be able to integrate it with having a lot of American cousins around as well.

The rhythm of mornings on the Ridge

(I am spending two and a half months living on my parents’ place in the mountains in rural Eastern Oregon with my two preschool-age children. Shaye, who is five, insists on going to kindergarten, even during our short stay. This is a vivid slice of life.)

I rise out of deep sleep with the trill of my cell phone, which has been demoted to a glorified alarm clock out in the Blue Mountains of Eastern Oregon with no signal.

First I inhale deeply before my eyes open. There is the pungent fragrance of the pellets that feed the miniature stove and the undertone of snow. My eyes open to the flickering light of the little orange flame at the foot of the big bed.

I reach over and fumble to turn off the alarm, so it doesn’t wake up Marik. Then I reluctantly role myself out of the froth of white blankets that cover the bed. I wish I had this nice of a bed at home in our little house near Prague in the Czech Republic. So much for roughing it in the mountains.

I stumble the few feet to the creaky ladder and blink hard to clear the sleep from my head as I climb in the warm semi-darkness, lit only by the stove. Above is the tiny loft, mostly crammed with boxes my mother is storing. There is a small space that has been cleared for two pallets on the floor and my children sleep there – four-year-old Marik and five… almost six-year-old Shaye. I squeeze into the opening between a cabinet and the railing to reach Shaye.

I brush her cheek in an attempt to wake her gently but she doesn’t stir. I can’t fit entirely into their tiny space without causing a fair amount of noise, so I resort to reaching down and lifting her by both arms as she sleeps. She wakes up as she is pulled out of her blankets but she doesn’t cry. She’s used to it and she loves kindergarten.

At first, her legs don’t hold her but I put her hands on the railing and guide her quietly through the little space. I have to hold her from behind as we slide down the ladder because she isn’t awake enough to be reliable.  Back down on the floor of the one-room cabin, we dress silently by firelight. Shaye is usually done first, despite the fact that I have laid out our clothes the night before. My head is still full of fluff.

She opens the door as I get my boots on and the icy air of the still-dark morning blasts against my nose. It must be more than ten below again. We step outside onto the frozen path. There isn’t much snow this morning, just a powdery dusting. I close the door quietly. Marik is still fast asleep. Shaye and I make our way toward the big house  

I put my hand on her shoulder and let her bob against my legs as we walk. The moon is waning but still fat and bright, hanging among the pines that tower above us on the western slope. An owl hoots up there in the trees. Then another answers from the woodlot in the hollow far below. Something else cries out in the predawn, an animal I don’t recognize.

We step quickly toward the house. A light has been left on for us but otherwise it is still dark and silent. We bustle inside, shedding boots and coats. I put water on for tea, while Shaye snuggles with the two dogs and one cat that greet us. In thirty five minutes, I get Shaye through hair brushing and a small bowl of cereal, sometimes half a cup of warm fruit tea and a few minutes of reading. Sometimes I can salvage the coals of last night’s fire in the big hearth. But sometimes I have to build it up from scratch.

When my watch says exactly 6:45, we have to start putting boots and coats on in earnest. At 6:50, Shaye stands outside while I lace up my high tops and mash my hat into place. Both dogs barrel out of the door, growling and nipping at each other playfully.

“I hear the bus,” Shaye yells and we start down the steep quarter-mile mud track that serves as our driveway. I can see the lights of the bus far below, making its way up the road beyond our property. In three minutes, we drop down to the county road that runs through the bottom of the hollow. The sky is barely starting to get light but the morning is as clear as the perfect note of a penny whistle.

We’re the furthest out on this school bus route. The driver, a sweet lady named Cindy, has to drive another mile up the road to find a place to turn around. Then, she comes back down the hill and picks Shaye. That way we have the five-minute warning to get us down the hill and we rarely have to wait long.

When we hear the bus approach again and see the warmth of its flashing lights in the distance, Shaye burrows against me, suddenly demanding of comfort and multiple hugs. I hug her and put the required kisses on her face as the bus slows and the doors open.

“‘Morning!” Cindy calls.

“‘Morning,”  I reply, as Shaye bounds up the steps and disappears into the darkened bus alone.

I stand and wave, even though I can’t see her behind the glass or at that distance. The one time I forgot to pretend to exchange waves with her, she gave me a hard time about it for days. So, I wave and smile and pretend that I can see her as the bus pulls away. One of the absurdities of being a legally blind mother.

In a moment the morning is as still and peaceful as that clear note of music. The sky has lightened a little along the horizon, though it will be a half an hour yet before the sun peeks up.  The only sound is the yipping of the dogs as they chace each other out in the neighbor’s pasture. I turn back up the road, pausing a few times just to admire the morning. The brightening skyline and the pink-hued clouds are blurry to me but still beautiful, something like an impressionist painting.

I take the grassier path back up the ridge. That one ends at the little cabin where Marik is still asleep. I slip in as silently as I can and sit in the rocking chair reading for a few minutes as the sun comes up and slowly illuminates my mother’s paintings which hang close together on the walls. This is normally her art studio, when we aren’t here. I can’t actually see the paintings unless I stand on the bed and put my face a few inches from them, but the amorphous blobs of them on the wall are comforting.

At about 7:30, Marik snuffles awake and calls out to see if I have returned from the bus yet. Then he pads over to the ladder and climbs down. He sits in my lap for awhile and I read one of the new stories I’ve ordered online. I tuck our latest addition into one of the big duffle bags I’m packing for the long trip back to the Czech Republic, a land of limited English-language children’s books, and we head back into the house.

Most mornings we are alone. My mom and my brother stay overnight in town more often than not. So, Marik and I make a more substantial breakfast, carry a load of wood down a long flight of narrow stairs to stoke the fire, wash the dishes and try to call Papa on Skype. Then it is time to find something useful to do with the four-year-old-oriented part of the day. Sometimes we just go for a walk to visit a neighbor or one of the huge trees on top of the ridge. Other days we cook or make cookies for the holidays. About once every two weeks, we can finagle a ride into town to visit the library.

Such is the rhythm of our mornings on Pumpkin Ridge. There is peace to it along with hard work.

Samhain at our house with songs and Grandfather Deer cookies

Samhain wasn't always my favorite holiday. It isn't easy to embrace death as part of the natural cycle. I don’t subscribe to any particular literal interpretation about what happens after we die but I do know that the spirits, energies or something of our ancestors is left and does play a role in our lives. I don’t feel like this is a scary thing. I get more comfort from it than anything else and this is what I would like to teach my children – the connection to and recognition of ancestors that gives comfort and strength. So, this is what Samhain is to us. 

I have two children ages 3 and 5 as well as a husband who wavers between being Pagan and atheist, depending on his mood. I enjoy the magic of childhood, so I embrace myths like Santa Claus. In fact, my children were so entranced by the story of Grandfather Deer visiting on Samhain in the book Circle Round that Grandfather Deer has taken to visiting us and delivering small gifts to children on the night of Samhain. Especially as they get older these will tend to be gifts with some spiritual connection or connection to ancestors.

Here are some ideas for what a family with small children can do to celebrate this Pagan holiday. This is what we do. We aren't Wiccan or anything specific. We are eclectic Pagans and I adapt a lot of things from the book Circle Round. 

Crafts and Cooking

We made a jack-o-lantern that we will leave outside and lit on Samhain to guide the spirits on the night when the veil between worlds is thin.

We went on a walk and collected pine cones and colorful leaves, and I made a fall wreath with the materials and a circle of willow switches left over from making dream catchers. A glue gun is truly a wonderful tool!

We made gingerbread cookies in the shapes of jack-o-lanterns, boys and girls, deer and elk and crescent moons. Then, we painted them with a bread-of-the-dead-type icing made with orange juice and powdered sugar. The deer and elk cookies were inspired by a children’s bedtime story in the book Circle Round, which tells how “Grandfather Deer” (a representation of the old horned god of ancient European Pagans) comes to lead one on a dream journey on Samhain to the Land of Youth, where children can play in the everlasting sun with gentle and supportive ancestor spirits for that one night.)

We painted color-diffusing leaf shapes in fall colors to hang on the wall.

Songs

First we sang Ring Around the Pumpkin for a few days as part of our regular morning singing and circle games.

Ring around the pumpkin
Pocket full of nuts
Leaves! Leaves!
They all fall down!

I thought it sounded silly when I read about it but the kids loved it and loved inserting “Hop around the pumpkin” or “Stomp” or “Tiptoe” or “Dance”. We did it first on the day we got our carving pumpkin and we put it in the middle still uncut. This may have helped to get the kids excited and after that they insisted that I make a pumpkin picture to put in the middle of the circle, because our jack-o-lantern had to stay outside for safety’s sake.

Then, Shaye kept asking me again and again why there is snow and why the leaves are falling off the trees and why we have Samhain. I explained all of these things in one way or another, more or less scientifically, until I finally made up this little ditty to the tune of “Are You Sleeping” in order to give a quick answer. And she loved it and has stopped bugging me, which I did not really expect.

Samhain is coming. (2x)
The Earth must rest. (2x)
The ancestors are calling. (2x)
We give thanks. (2x)

Children laughing (2x)
Red leaves falling (2x)
It’s time for trick-or-treating (2x)
On Samhain night. (2x)

Salt and apples (2x)
I leave tonight (2x)
For the grandfather deer (2x)
Who keeps me safe. (2x)

As popular as these songs were with the preschool set, neither really did it for me. Especially when the topic is spirits and ancestors, I hunger for something a bit more… well, spiritual. So, walking back through the woods with Marik, after dropping Shaye off at preschool I made up this song to the tune of “Michael Rows the Boat Ashore”. It works well if you draw out the first syllable of the element mentioned in the even lines.

Listen to the ancestors’ call,
Hush in the wind.
Listen to the ancestors call,
Song in the water.

Listen to the ancestors call,
Dark of the earth.
Listen to the ancestors’ call,
Dance of the flame.

Fun and Ritual

This year Samhain will be a bit hectic for us because we are crossing the Atlantic to be with my family in Oregon and will likely have extreme jetlag. But we will still hope to dress up and go out for a little trick-or-treating. I am not thrilled with it, given my older child's extreme sensitivities to food coloring and other things in mainstream candy but it is nice to have a purpose for dressing up, which is simply too fun for children to forgo.

I’m not overly fond of the gruesome or horrific aspects of Halloween. I think these were made up to make Pagan beliefs seem evil and frightening. Instead, I focus on dressing up that is simply fun or perhaps dressing up in the garb of people in history, our ancestors.

The flying several thousand miles and dressing up does tend to put a crimp in my plans for more spiritual rituals involving children, because the kids will be completely exhausted. So, we'll keep it very simple, I’ll help the kids make a “mute supper” of apples, salt and a few of our cookies to put out by the jack-o-lantern, which we’ll light.  In the morning the children will find their Samhain gifts where they left the food. I have decided to spread out gift giving, so that the children will get only one gift at Yule but they will get one at other times of the year as well, though they may not be large or expensive. This is primarily in hopes of reducing stress for everyone concerned but I also like to spread around the sense of magic.

The idea of giving gifts to children on Samhain comes from the assumption that children are closer to the spirits, because they were born only recently. Thus, giving gifts or sweets to small children is a way of giving gifts to the ancestors as well. 

Either in the evening or in the morning, depending on when the children are able to participate, we have a short, fun activity to mark the renewal of the year. We open up the back door to say goodbye to the old year and then run to the front door to welcome the new year with noise makers and a song. We might also sing a more generic song such as:

Round and round the earth is turning.
Always turning round to morning
And from morning round to night.

I hope to hold a more involved Samhain ritual for adults when the children are asleep, including purifying thehouse and specifically our i-Ching and Tarot materials, runes and elements symbols. At home in the Czech Republic, the wall behind our family alter is covered with picture-symbols for the various groups and cultures of ancestors represented in our household. So, there are Celtic, Slavic, Norse, Romani and Hindu symbols as well as symbols specifically remembering the women who struggled through conflict and pain to give us life and remembering those who held Pagan beliefs but had to hide them for a variety of reasons. These are all on little circles that are on a black velvety background around a triple moon symbol.

The ritual usually includes carrying the light from our family alter to an earth alter in the stone circle behind our house. We burn slips of paper with qualities and problems that we would like to leave behind, and we will leave an offering of food, water, fire and sage. We end with asking our ancestors for protection of our home. In the morning we light our special alter candles again and call in particular blessings or qualities we wish for the next year or make Samhain resolutions.  We renew energy protections on our house by smudging and sprinkling salt at entrances and windows.

Raising Little Pagans

Here is our first video showing the hands-on approach to Pagan seasonal festivals with children. This video covers Samhain through Ostrara and gives specific ideas of what a family with preschool-age children can accomplish. We are eclectic and follow no particular rigid tradition.

Happy watching. This video is appropriate for all ages.

Please note that my fiction is not aimed at children. The Soul and the Seed is a contemporary fantasy thriller with Pagan leanings. I recommend it for ages sixteen and up due to intense content, including some realistic violence. I hope Pagan readers will enjoy these books but I urge parents to be cautious about recommending them to children.